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[14 Oct 2004|01:51am] |
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my journal is now...
FRIENDS ONLY
comment to be added, i take anyone, minus about seven.
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[13 Oct 2004|03:10pm] |
i just spent roughly 136.50$ on concert tickets.
i havent been to a "real" show in so long,
plus i bought a ticket for marc too on each occasion.
and then theres shows coming up where i can pay at the door rather then online,hot damn.
oct 15: theres always forever, silent film, uptown stomp, aberdien, settle for more @ the barn...this is your last chance kiddies, ask me for directions or whatever just please go, kthx.
oct 22: senses fail, i herd madison isnt playing this one tho =( @ thunderdome
oct 24: silent film @ thunderdome, john lennon's son is coming so i suggest you go support!
oct 25: dead poetic, acceptance @ ottobar
oct 26: blood brothers @ black cat (havent got tickets yet, not sure about this one)
oct 28: theres always forever, this day and age, and hopefully voodoo blue and aberdien @ thunderdome
oct 30: theres always forever at some church in fells point
nov 3: lostprophets isnt coming on this show so fuck you story of the year and my chemical romance
nov 6: this day and age @ my brothers place...twice in one week HELL YEAH
nov 7: matchbook romance @ 930 club (prolly not going to this one)
nov 10: the used, head automatica @ 930 club
nov 20: a static fucking lullaby @ ottobar
nov 23: taking back sunday and funeral for a friend @ 930 club
nov 26: straylight run @ ottobar (maybe)
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[12 Oct 2004|03:15am] |
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i wish it was only him and me. secluded. together. forever. no one and nothing else. but 2 cats, a cd player, and a bed. ala ala always.
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[11 Oct 2004|12:55am] |
and one more thing...
jasonunderscore: she was like yeah that jess girl from sysksvill shes a biog poser little mrs punk rock indie gril bullshit she was all nysnc chick in 9th and 10th grade
jasonunderscore: cause she asked matt about you
whoever that was. i HATE punk rock. i love fucking rock music and chick singers. and i would still listen to n sync if they didnt go rap on my ass. so if youre reading this, or if you know who said that, come say it to my face. so i can set you straight. and the fact that this was said at a GOOD CHARLOTTE signing, you wanna talk about posers? and said to, who she prolly thinks, is my best friend...what was she expecting to get out of it? i dont know why this gets to me so much...i just hate when people get the wrong impression, id like to set the mother fucker straight.
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[11 Oct 2004|12:17am] |
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hes such a little punk. always playing his guitar, using the computer, showering, sleeping, watching tv...i fall asleep (very rare) and he plays with his toys. i wake up and want to leave, and he throws a hissy fit. i pretend to go out the door....he doesnt chase after me til a few minutes later, what if i really left? whatever. hes fucking adorable. and i so deserve him, cos he really is great. i just like to pretend to bitch. no one has ever treated me so good. im glad i dont have to search all over and have my heart race everyday in hope someone will talk to me. his band is getting somewhere, thanks to my brillance. everyone says hes gonna be famous one day, and i believe it. people at school make him sign the stickers b4 he gives them to them. and he doesnt get it. he doesnt get how fucking wonderful he is and how everyone loves him. but hes mine. mine mine mine. =P
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[10 Oct 2004|06:47pm] |
thursday night i stayed at kristins because my shower and toilet were broken. we watched saved and the perfect score. saved was the most hilarious thing i have ever seen, next to napoleon dynamite. we stayed up til 5 talking about, i dont even know what.
friday i had to finally get to school about my transcript. mrs swomley did her usual "where are you going". shut the fuck up lady. we then watched grind, okay also hilarious. then i ventured to marc's. we sat around like losers then went to see raise your voice. i wont tell you the details, but it was so fucking sad!!! i spent the nite and we expressed our love in the best way we have all week.
saturday we slept til 2 and it felt so good. we drove around in circles. eventully we made it to our destination - copied flyers and then downtown annapolis. along the way we picked up laurren. i had never been to DA, it was lame just like laurren says. and "scene kids" are fucking dicks. specally tight pants ones. on the way back to laurrens we stoped at 711 where there was a guy in a white robe, we didnt know if he was jesus or a KKK dude. figured he was jesus tho. on the way home marc and eddie got fucking silly and laughed til they cried and hurt. beautiful. i spent the nite at marcs and we loved it up all over again. by that i mean he told me to get away, sit in my chair, stop touching him, and more with the rude remarks. hahahaha hes so cute. and im so annoying =P
today i went to my step cousins birthday party. shes one of those fake nice people, i see the bitch in her. her bf is some homeboy whose hella nice. i didnt see them touch or sit or talk together. cute? i played some mean games of volleyball.
[[[[[i love my boyfriend, even when hes not around i have so much more confidence. ive become so much more outgoing. gaaaaaaah. i can see his "good morning" face everywhere i go. in those silly purple soccer pants. and i know youre reading this, so tell me you love me, punk. haha]]]]]
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[07 Oct 2004|01:03am] |
i spent a lot of time by myself today. i bought a book, fucking go me.
i visited keri...shes sooooooo cute.
i drove 136 miles.
i got the most random kiss-make-out-session ever and i loved it more then i love him.
we played dodgeball, im a good dodger and give all the big boys the balls.
everyone loves marc and its fucking cute, he runs around like a little girl with his pants fallin down and they still love him.
it was freezing outside and i love that.
i get at least 2 comments a day on my shoes.
i want a plaid skirt.
and the perks of being a wallflower which i cannot find.
there are so many shows coming up, im excited, its been a while.
i live for the weekends where i can love it up.
gaaaah. love love love love.
he puts the blanket in the dryer and it gets sooooo warm and we cuddle up.
he says were gonna be like the movies, and stay bunnies forever.
get it?
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[06 Oct 2004|02:24am] |
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be here or ill kick you in the face...that means you: justin, courtney, jeff, codi, melanie, lauren, christie, candace, kimmi, laurie, laurren, emilee and your lover butt, and everyone else and their mom. thanks.
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[06 Oct 2004|01:04am] |
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today kristin cut my bangs. i took like a million pictures cos i got bored. i think i like them, im not sure. i like them better with my hood up. haha other then that i dont have much to update about. hmmmm. last nite i smelt like smoke, ive never been able to smell smoke on myself b4 because i was so used to it. my hair was disgusting. thanks for telling me i was disgusting b4 guys!! haha. i wanna take singing lessons, how do i go about finding them? and thanks to christie, i have decided my tattoo: 3 pairs of paw prints going along my hip bone (but right about cos that would hurt) going towards my side. so whoever wants to get tattoos together (melanie?) holla at me. i redid my buddy list for the first time in my life because i was that bored. we get the keys to the new house next wednesday, i hope we move next weekend. eeeeee other wise only 3 weeks!
( pretty pretty princess )
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[05 Oct 2004|02:37am] |
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tonite was pretty gosh dern fun. i went to see ballyhoo, voodoo blue, and agents of the sun at fletchers. my tisha came and that was cool. i got the biggest hug in the world from lil, it actully toped keri's from the other day. i hung out with lauren and melanie and it was the best EVER. ive never loved a drunk person b4, until now. melanie was sooooo hilarious and dancin all over the place. it was so freakin cute. gah i miss those 2. i think i have filled that piece of empty i have been feeling.
now lets discuss voodoo blue. dan's voice is beautiful. but its way too emo. they played all new stuff xcept 3 songs. he cannot do mike's part, its just not good. the new songs were freakin awesome, but it strays away from their rock feel. one was kind of poppy and one was kinda hardcore. clunky needs to never sing again. the few screams were cute tho. all in all, it was good. if mike was never in it, i would love them. but i miss mike too much, its not the same. i will cry a river now, thanks.
i need to take a poll on my cat paw tattoo idea: i was gonna get them little in pairs going up my stomach. but i thought about the getting fat or pregnant thing, although i know you use coco butter, but it could get nasty. i was thinking up the lower part of my leg, like wrapping around. but theres bone and shit there and that might hurt or look gay. so what should i do...any other spots?
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[04 Oct 2004|02:22am] |
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i decided (with help from one of justin's entrys) to stop being so negative. nothing is ever perfect, get over the little things. and appreciate shit. don't be a fag, jessika.
everyones homecoming pictures have been awesome so far, i wanna see more! and i wanna go dammit. i must find a way!
here are pictures lover face and i took the other night. he got this hat that makes him look like he should be drinking coffee or something. or he needs dreads.
( ugh hes so dreamy )
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[03 Oct 2004|02:22pm] |
tony just picked up marc for practice and i miss him already.
we spent all weekend being gay together.
he fell asleep as soon as we got here friday after the food and computer routine. this was around 1am...fucker
saturday we went to see tokyo rose/aberdien/downtown singapore/derby lane at my brothers place. eddie sung with TR and it was awesome cos he sings just like that dude. jake is good in DTS. i didnt know paul levitt got kicked out of aberdien =(
we didnt get back here until like 3am. we showered and ate and stuff. then watched the new rock movie, walking tall. only it was like 6 and we were ready to sleep.
im really sick of PMSing, it better stop soon. if i find out im all pissed off for a real reason, thats not gonna be good.
I WANNA BE PAID ATTENTION TO!!!!!!!
haha i saw an underscore flier with their new song on it "your no angel" hahahahahahahahahaha ahahaaaaa way to spell guys.
tomorrow night is fuckin voodoo blue, agents of the sun, and ballyhoo at fletchers...i cant wait. the side bar is gay, you better be at fletchers.
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[01 Oct 2004|01:00am] |
i so love him.
and cant wait to spend the whole weekend with him.
including a tokyo rose show.
nothing matters when im with him.
i don't want or need anything else...
sometimes i think that part is a lie.
but whatever
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[29 Sep 2004|01:08am] |
new lj layout, kinda feelin it.
theres a few people i used to kill to be friends with, then i didnt want to let them go for the world, theyve slowly started falling out of my life, and i need to push them out completely. theyve just been hanging there tearing me apart without even knowing it. i need to pretend they dont exsist. i need new friends.
i don't know why i left my old life style, im such an idiot. everytime i drive down 32, entering carroll county, i get a huge smile and get really happy. im surrounded by everything im used to, and i run into the ones i like. i realized i did like a good bit of ya'll ;)
sometimes i miss century, just the routine of it all. seeing keri's huge smile in the hall. justin picking me up and hugging me. the hi how are you's to middle school friends. seeing emily's new shiny outfit everyday.
moving here was the end of me. moving to hoco better be the beginning.
melaine, lauren, laurren...will you be my friends again? *hehe*
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[28 Sep 2004|01:09am] |
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ah i am so bored. not being in school while the boyfriend is really puts a damper on my life. but its okay once i move ill have some closer friends. man all this movin around, i thought this was gonna be a good move for me. but shit changes too much. i realized im really curtious when it comes to driving. i let everyone over. and shit like that. i hate the fuckers that don't yeild and don't use turn signals. i really am a good driver too, i deserve a better car. damn the man. i also realized, growing up i had a lot of shitty friends. all the people i call my friends, just put me down all the time. i was always called dumb and slow. i thought i was just silly. but to this day those people still think im not capable of things, say i sound like an idiot, they make me feel like im not mature enough. well fuck you guys for never believeing in me and putting me down all the time. but i always go back to those people, i cant let them go. no matter how mad they make me. if i subtracted everyone from my life that pisses me off, id have no one, but one. as of late i only hang out with one, but i try to talk to everyone else. im so sick of being put down. im not a dumbass. i have morals, values, opinions, fucking strong opinions, i don't sound like an idiot, i know how to do shit...stop walking all over me.
<lj-cut text="i got bored, theres 2 in here for lauren">
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[27 Sep 2004|12:29am] |
my parents are in hawaii til next wednesday.
he told me not to go home tonite, but i didnt wanna stay up all night by myself and wake up early for him to leave and for me to lay there all day by myself. but being here alone sucks more, i shoulda stayed with him. i always miss sleeping next to him, but when im there sometimes my insomnia kicks in. i wish it was still summer so he could spend all week with me.
i remember the first 4 days we spent together, with no parents. they were so much fun. we learned so much about each other. we fell in love that week.
why do they call it FALLING in love? falling is usually seen as a bad thing, but i guess love turns out bad 9 outta 10 times. tho it wasnt love if it ends up bad...i talk in circles.
he played with my necklace like he was some sort of fucking cat, god it doesnt get any more cute then that.
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[26 Sep 2004|02:17pm] |
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i have the best boyfriend ever...he doesnt know how girls work...
this girl IMs him saying she found his band on purevolume (they dont even have music up on there) and shes all. i can get you guys a show up here, in philly. continues with nice band things. then asks for a pic. (i knew what you were up to little girl) first he was gonna send her one of someone else, but then he sent a goofy one and
she: youre cute
him: thanks my girlfriend tells me that all the time
she: my boyfriend tells me i have big boobs
him: my girlfriend tells me that too
then she stopped talking. hahahahaha. that was a good one
anyways. his band, THERES ALWAYS FOREVER, has a show at the barn in spencerville (laurie's barn is what i call it) playin with mike davis' band silent film, and prolly curbside and emergency exit. this is on FRIDAY OCTOBER 15 for 5 bucks. so bring your lazy asses out...more reminders later. *directions - 29 south, right on old columbia road, church/barn is on the right at a blinking yellow light*
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[24 Sep 2004|12:05am] |
one wrong day and i think the world is gonna end.
the kid was sick the day b4 and has a lot to deal with, and i gotta be selfish and think its my fault.
i talked to him and today he chased me with ice, it was grand.
we watched daddy day care and cuddled the whole time like we used too.
im all tired and worn out like the good ol days.
and note to all: TIGHT PANTS ARE THE WORST CREATION EVERRRRRRRRR!!!@12221334453!!!!
i went to his school for some meeting on being able to park in the parking lot and the rules and shit. it was so funny seeing everyone laugh at the rules that EVERY SCHOOL HAS. i remember when i used to do it. century wasnt such a bad school after all, you don't realize a lot until you're out. i want to write them a letter.
im now going to do buttface's homework because i have nothing else to do.
one love.
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[23 Sep 2004|01:27am] |
the littlest things piss me off:
he wont lay with me for more than 10 minutes at a time.
either his lips are chaped, his stomach hurts, or hes hot = wont touch me
i did his homework and he rolled over, he would have fallen asleep if it wasnt time for me to go.
he tells me last minute that i have to drive him somewhere.
he tells me last minute he has no money for food and other things.
i drive an hour in traffic, everyday.
hes always doing something with his guitar or the tv.
hes always tired or falls asleep fast.
he wears tighter pants now.
he doesnt skate nemore.
he makes me sit at his band practice.
his sister is 4 and annoying as hell.
his mom is always complaining to me about his attitude and expects me to fix it.
but everynight he puts his hands on my face the same way and tells me he loves me over and over again with the brightest smile i have ever seen.
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[22 Sep 2004|12:04am] |
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tomorrow i drop all my classes because they wont transfer to howard community, or ccbc. im pretty sure im going to catonsville, but still thinkin about it. so ive got nothing to do until the end of january. if i tell you i cant go to a show cos i live too far - im lying. make me go because ill have nothing to do the next day.
im moving b4 november first, as soon as we sell this place. so play with me.
i love black people, i will miss them when i drop my classes. i love the way they talk and say FO REAL all the time. and how theyre aloud to say the N word and its so funny.
its cool how music ties to so many memories... bleed the dream acoustic - good ones of matt bleed the dream regular - bad ones of laurren kristin and matt taking back sunday - good ones of heather matt and laurie a static lullaby - laurie and joe fall out boy - good ones with the underscore crew hoobastank - good ones of my concert careerr taking off this day and age - great ones of mahcus voodoo blue - good ones with lauren melanie heather and kristin
i really wanna write mike a letter, i need to get it to him tho.
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